Friday, September 5, 2008

Thoughts in the Night

Rethinking facebook...
It is addictive.Yet with every passing day,there is an unsettling loss growing within. Logging on, I'm immediately met with updates on my myriad of 'friends' -- people I know (and some I want to know) but don't really know. Their numbers grow, providing a false perception of relational-ism -- they are my 'friends' -- but what do I really know about them? Other than knowing that they are 'contemplating the universe" or "taking a break" or "happy for the weekend."

Two friends overseas actually talk about life in a different culture and the pictures of friends at a distance are good reminders. But the vast majority of these 'friendships' are spread out over a thin veneer of depth. There is no requirement to invest in their lives beyond benign comments. I don't know their joys and sorrows. We are not pilgrims together, finding meaning along life's path.

Rather, we are glib, cyber-drive-by-commenters skimming the surface of life. It makes me -- not bitter -- but deeply sad -- this psuedo sharing of the insignificant.

We dare not ask the hard questions like:
What does life mean?
Why am I here?
How can I make a difference?

Instead we feature new notches on our friend belts, snapshots, games, flair buttons and lists of where we've been.

I am the worst offender of relationship-lite!

But every night, in the half-light between wake and sleep, there is a pinch of sadness --
for not encouraging my friend in her faith journey,
for forgetting to affirm the young mom who puts family first,
for sending 'I-heart-you' buttons to the niece who would do better with personal attention.

Facebook -- merely faces with books that gloss over the real stuff of life and relationship. I'm not giving up on it, but...

...let there be more than this, is my prayer,
...let us be truly present,
...let us make even a small difference that resounds in eternity
...let it be so!

4 comments:

La Perfectionista said...

facebook is an odd phenomenon indeed. and it's not just facebook...it's the computer...the internet...pdas...everything in our daily lives that makes us more accessible, yet in a strange way, less relational. but take heart my friend. of all the people i know, you invest more time in nurturing relationships the right way. and i for one, benefit tremendously from that, both personally and as an example to me of how to do it successfully. love you!!

Anonymous said...

wow. all so true about facebook. its so addictive. it is fun. i have a handful of "friends" that i hardly knew/know. and friends that i once knew that i do not think are walking with the Lord know. and i wonder how to connect deeper with them.
i will say that being overseas ... and having the vast majority of my friends in the U.S. - it is fun for me to have this virtual social past time. in estonia, if one wishes, you could go days without someone talking ... estonians are people of very few words. so even the casual "waiting for the weekend" update is some sort of conversation. the more i live overseas i do see that americans are the kings and queens of surface meaningless but polite chit chat ... and europeans and others are more about just a handful of deep friendships.
Lots of love to you.
Christy

UAE Hildebrands said...

Just found YOUR blog...now I see why you crush me in meaningless Word Twist....:) What beautiful poems and thought provoking comments...In our case, I would argue that facebook has deepened our friendship,hmm? Although actually I agree with you on the whole. Love you!!

RickRack said...

Well, yes... there is that aspect, Mattie. And a pretty precious aspect it is when one considers being able to have instant connection with people a world away!

Oh.... Word Twist! Gotta love it. it is almost as addictive as Tetris (Christy just got the whole story on that one.) Soon we will have to form FA and WTA to add to AA.

Happy weekend!